My Christmas Story

I had a very cool experience this Christmas season that I want to tell you about. I’ve been going to the temple more often, like every Tuesday at 7 AM. This Tuesday, after the session, I came out and checked my phone. I had a message from a business client and associate who lives in Rockwall. We had been trying to get together on the phone for a few weeks without success. His message suggested that he would call again between 9 and 10 AM (I got the message at 9), and that he had a funeral to do at 11 (he owns several cemeteries and a funeral home). I had a feeling to go and talk with him. I was thinking it might be about church, particularly Prop 8, but knowing him to be sincere, I wasn’t worried to talk. It was a little of a long shot to drive out and chance to catch him, but I did it. When I got there, before I got out of the car, I saw him running to his truck to leave. I called out to him and got out to try to catch him. He got out, came over, and gave me a strong embrace, which was quite the first. He was very glad to see me and though he didn’t have much time, he took me back into the funeral home to a private room to talk. Immediately he began talking of the troubles of the world. I told him we (the world) needed a change of heart due to the gospel of Christ (as opposed to Obama’s change). He told me he was a Christian Baptist. I told him I was too (no, not Baptist). He said, “but your Christ is not the same, is it?” I told him that our Christ is the only name given under heaven whereby men can be saved” and that He was my personal Savior. I told him that His name was on our church. I told him that our church is all about the atonement of Christ. The spirit was powerful between us. For sure, he felt it. He was excited about it. So was I. He was going to meet with a prominent LDS businessman later that week from SLC who is the 2nd largest funeral home operator in the country and wanted to know a little before he met him! As we continued to talk, he asked how my business was doing. I told him that the retirement community in Burleson that we have worked on for more than 2 years had unraveled due to the economy. He said he was having lunch the next day with a gentleman in a related business who might have some interest and invited me to come back the next day to lunch with them.
Needless to say, I was pretty excited, both at the prospect of continuing a discussion with Dewayne about the church, but also a possible sale for the retirement development. So I went back to Rockwall on Wednesday. I was first to arrive at the restaurant. Dewayne got there shortly after. The other gentleman was late to come, which was a good thing. While we waited, we talked more about the church. We covered a shotgun of topics, including the Word of Wisdom, Families, the Book of Mormon and more. When we finished, just before the other guy arrived, he said, “you know, I should probably be a Mormon!” Of course thought I, I could help him with that! The meeting with the other man was not a success as far as Burleson was concerned, but wholly worth the time and effort to have the conversation with my friend. One neat thing about him is that he is extremely prominent in Rockwall and respected by many, many people. I am going to put together a package of items, including a Book of Mormon, The Testament, and a copy of the Family Proclamation and take it to him for Christmas.
Isn’t it amazing that when we talk to people about Jesus Christ, the spirit is there to testify of His divine mission, and not for any eloquence or ability of ours. That is his (the spirit’s) most important role. He is good at it!

Air like Shrek's Swamp

Some of you may be aware of the air quality issues that exist here in Midlothian. USA Today conducted a significant survey of over 120,000 schools nationwide. It listed Mt. Peak Elementary, where Dustin attends, as in the 1st percentile of all offenders, together with all the other schools our children attend being in the top worst 5 percent! Here is the link to the recap on WFAA (channel 8 here): http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfaa081211_mo_airpollution.53f937f9.html#slcgm_comments_anchor
In apparent attempt to asuage concerned parents, although completely unqualified, JD Kenedy, Superintendent the MISD, issued a statement to the community that he had inquired with the TCEQ (Texas Commission on Environmental Quality) and all is well (...in Zion). Here is his statement:
http://www.midlothian-isd.net/_misdnews/archive/misd-air.html
I decided to post replies through several media, and here is a copy of my comments:
The influence of big money seems to be penetrating every level of government and politics. That it should also affect the course of public education is bewildering to a trusting public. My wife spoke to the attendance person at school the other day and asked her what she thought about this alarming news. In response, she recited Dr. Kenedy's statement and parrotted his feelings, exclaiming that she had been here 30+ years and everything is fine to her. Maybe, but what about everyone else?! The problem is that not everyone reacts to these toxins the same way. For example, I am allergic to Benadryl, commonly used to help with allergic reactions! For whatever reason, it makes my heart race at an alarming and life-threatening rate. The toxins being unnecessarily spewed out of these factories, like a game of Russian Roulette, are killing unsuspecting citizens while the EPA, TCEQ and now, MISD stand by, in the face of ever-mounting quantities of evidence, and offer lame statements endorsing the offenders. The scriptures speak of those in the latter days who call evil good and good evil. While some may live healthy lives with no adverse reaction to the proven and known toxins, others will surely suffer. How can we turn this blind eye?! I hear the words from pro-cement advocates, "Midlothian needs TXI. Midlothian needs Holcim. Midlothian needs Ash Grove." "There are too many jobs, too much money and too much power to make them comply with clean emissions standards and lose them." I ask, how is this point of view really different than the selling of Senate seats, with comments like, "...it's worth too much #$%^& money to give it away"? The bottom line is that it is wrong! Do we want a legacy for our children that reads, "Big Business over Young Minds?" Will our ephithats read, "Rest in peace, uh, no, scratch that--I mean Rest in cement kiln dust!" It is time to do as the Boy Scouts and live the Scout Law, being Trustworthy, Loyal, Helpful, Friendly, Courteous, Kind, Obedient, Cheerful, Thrifty, Brave, Clean, and Reverent. It is time to do as Jesus taught, to do unto others as we would have them do unto us, NOT before they can do it to us.

Crazy what goes on in this little town...

OK, WHAT did you do to Rudolph?!

So we get home and what is Dakota sporting with this time? You got it--Rudolph's antlers! Sorry kids, thanks to this insane pero negro, there is no red-nosed reindeer to guide santa's sleigh! Only a pitch black canine freak. But wait...I hear a new song coming on...maybe she'll do??

Then one foggy afternoon,


Bradley's comin' home.


D'kota with your eyes so bright,


Won't you trash my house tonight?


Then all the humans squeal-ed,


As they yelled it out in pain.


They'll never let Dakota,


Ever out her kennel again!!!


I have absolutely no idea where she came up with the antlers. When she first brought them home, they were connected with a swatch of skull. I've been worried that we'll find them planted in the tread of one of our car tires, since she leaves them any old place. Sort of reminds me of a certain refrigerator wheel, right BJ? Have we bonded with this dog yet?



Zac and I had a good campout last weekend down at the Johnson's ranch. Here are a couple of photos.





We decided to sleep with no fly on the tent. The moon was huge and bright, so we went to sleep watching it. It was cold but great!




Zac doesn't get cold--everyone else (except Russell) is bundled to the hilt.





I guess one of the highlights was when Matt, a lovable symmetrically shaped young man in our troop (that means his height and width proportions are approximately equivalent), slipped down the slope of the pond and became stuck in the mud in shallow water, unable to extract himself. He was a good sport, drying out the best he could near the fire. He didn't have a change of clothes. Notice how he smiles so big, even when his back is turned... Here's a big turtle he brought back with him!










This is Andy picking out Saphire's hooves. I did Sky's. Whoa, it's not the same picking out a 2200 lb shire as our 1100 lb quarters! What fun, though.




The pair pulled the wagon loaded with about 20 people all over the hills of the ranch. Incredible!

The Bitch is Back

With the premature demise of her only offspring, Dakota has quickly returned to her youthful exuberance that characterized her prior to child bearing and parental responsibilities. This is not wholy a good thing. Sure, it is entertaining to watch her bounce and prance and run, drag sticks twice her size, and generally make Tigger look like Gary from SpongeBob. But unfortunately, her sense of good judgment has shrunk as fast as her puppy-less teats and everything seems to be fair game once again. When I was asked by a fellow scouter at church yesterday what animal brain we would be bringing next (see our previous post regarding squirrel anatomy), I considered a certain black dog...
Do any of you remember Elton John's song, the one that inspired the title to this post???
If we didn't all enjoy her the rest of the time, we would entice her to go play with the neighbor's goats. Some of you will get my drift.
This is the remains of our competition volleyball, now stripped of its entire padded outer layer. You will see it as multi-colored flecks strewn across the front yard. Notice her remorse...


This is what is left of Laurie's autographed beach ball from girls camp. Who needs sentimental crap anyway. Thanks, Dakota. How she got it down is a mystery, unless she was able to bounce ninja-style off of the lockers, then the van and finally up the shelves and pull it out. Again, notice her perked up ears. Yes, there were things being uttered under our breath that she has not heard before!


Actually, she was looking over at the rest of her mayhem. Somehow she was able to open the Rubbermaid bin, pull out a string of Christmas lights (one of the few good ones no less), and rip parts of it to shreds. Boots, shoes, her own pillow, and cardboard are all part of her reverie. She just plain went nuts. This is all over one night's time. I think I am going to start keeping her in the rabbit cage (the rabbit was also a victim of her playtime craziness).

Squirrel anatomy class

I got home from work to find that a large unfortunate tree rat was lying dead in my front yard, apparently the victim of Dakota's very fast and agile hunting skills. He had not been lifeless long as his body was still quite supple. The logical thing to do of course was to pick him up and chase Dustin and Lauren with him. While the loud high pitched squeals were anticipated, we decided to turn the squirrel's unfortunate demise into a science project. We decided to disect him and examine his organs! So off to the bridge we all went, Zac, Dustin Lauren and I, to educate ourselves. Here are the results. WARNING: if you are a little squeamish, this may not be for you!

This initial incision gave us a good view of the colon, liver, heart, lungs and stomach, and probably some other stuff we weren't sure of, as well as, well, his male components.

This is a view of the heart cut in two as well as the lungs. The dark red mass is coagulated blood. We did this on the bridge so we could feed the fish and turtles in the pond when we finished.

This is simply gross. Maybe we have lived out too long...

In this photo, we learned that Shrek was telling the truth when he said that eyes are filled with jelly, as seen here to the right of the skull.

We all wanted to see the brain intact, so we took the head to the scroll saw, cut off just the top of the cranium, and voila! We were able to extract it along with the mudulla oblongata (we assume that if crocodiles have one as Col. Sanders taught us, squirrels surely do too). Here is what we found:

Dustin is taking the brain to school tomorrow in a jar filled with alcohol. Lauren claimed the skull and the tail. Kym was thrilled, needless to say. Zac has claim to the exterior male genitalia, which he is considering placing on the desk of his athletics coach who gave him lunch detention today for arriving 4 minutes early rather than 5 minutes. There are, perhaps, many ways to interpret such a gesture. I counseled Zac that he may not want to take credit for the exhibit, if he elects to go through with it!

Well, that's it for another day. Who knows what tomorrow will bring!

Post-Thanksgiving chillin

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving at our home. Due to a dead battery and a mysteriously missing fuel pump relay (haha), Craig and Audrie were unable to leave when they planned. Chance, Dustin, Dakota and I took advantage of this opportunity to have lunch and a movie in the underground fort in the back. It was pretty cool to be six feet under and still moving around! Here are some pictures:

We took off a small part of the roof to let a little more light in. You can see what a wonderful cavernous hangout it is! The back wall is closed up with railroad ties. One enters by crawling through a 15' tunnel (that's where Dustin is squatting in the picture above), then dropping into the main chamber. Chance brought all the food in his backpack.

Since we couldn't find Lion King 1, we watched Lion King 1 1/2. We dined on PBJ's, chips, oranges, apples, Fruit Gushers, Kool-Aid and more--fare for a king!

It was hard to keep Dakota out of the food...

Chance had to guard his PBJ carefully!

Simba chillin out just like us!

I don't think he was scared, maybe cold a little...



We all hated to go, but a messenger was sent to end the party (and call me to fix the car...)

Some of you know that we have had a long-term canine guest at our home: Dakota. Dakota married Cosmo and they had a little girl: Vudoo. Very sadly, Vudoo went swimming in the pool with inadequate supervision last Saturday and now resides under several hundred pounds of dirt in our way back yard pet cemetery, which is now becoming quite populated. We were all very sad about this, especially Dustin who locked himself in his room when he found out. Vudoo, we are sorry and we will miss you. Dakota, I guess you don't get spayed just yet after all.


Each morning, Dakota, Cosmo and I accompany Dustin up to wait for the bus at the corner. Dakota, a very smart dog (not that she often uses it for good...), has learned a new trick, which Dustin captured on video as follows:




Typically, she licks off the mucoidal delicacy on her first jump. This one did not dangle as well as others. Oh well. Who knows what other tricks we'll learn while waiting for the bus!

This next picture relates to my last post, item 6. This is how I knew Dustin was home from school today. Please notice 1) empty tp roll on the right, and 2) fully clogged toilet on the left! For goodness sakes! It simply doesn't take an entire roll to clean or even to polish such a small bum! I am considering tp rationing...

Finally, I wanted to add some interesting detail on the endless counting that goes on in my mind. First, you may find, as do I, that if you cluster the counting, it becomes at once more reliable and easier. For example, you can count to 10 by 1,2,3,4...10. OR, you can hear two groups of 3 beats and one group of 4 beats and that is 10. I wonder if any computer algorithms take advantage of this approach? It is WAY easier to count this way, then you just have to keep track of the 10's.
The other number related thing is that I sometimes convert to other number bases. For example, when I saw BJ and Katherine's house address, 11101, I converted it from binary to 29 base 10 (decimal). That made it pretty easy to remember and also serves as an error check.
So that's it for tonight's show. Happy Thanksgiving to all our family and friends :)

No pictures, just text, so if that's boring to you, adios. I am in a quirky mood, so here goes my six someone asked me for a long time ago but I ignored:

1. My mind works with numbers only. Names don't stick until a number goes with it, doesn't matter if it's a phone number, a serial number, or a tail number--I need numbers to think.

2. Which brings me to the next item: I count in my head for any repetitive activity in which I engage. It is automatic. It comes from my Medulla Oblongatta (however you spell that, Waterboy). For example, when I urinate, the counter starts. The number counting has been in french for 30 years now. So, a safety stop will count out to between 10-15. A recognizable but not yet serious situation is a 15-25 tic event. A wake me up out of a dead sleep will go for 30-45. A STOP everything now and go this instant will get 60 or more... And lest you think it is limited to dehydration exclusively, I count steps as I run, cycle, fill my water containers, chew, brush my teeth, etc, etc ad nausium

3. Speaking of brushing my teeth, I am meticulous. I think I passed this down to Amber (was it in your post about brushing teeth being an absolute prerequisite to going to bed?) So, my morning brushing gets 10 strokes for each "station" in my mouth. I have assigned 22 stations, which means 220 brush storkes, with each one being a "back-forth". Yes, I am OCD, no doubt. Night time gets double, with some extra work to make sure the nasty textured crap on the inside is for sure gone, cuz the tongue travels religiously and methodically over the teeth 24/7 and it KNOWS the crap spots and will NOT let me alone if there is some. So that makes 440 + at night. Now you know why it takes me so long to get to bed. The up side is that I recently went to the dentist for my first cleaning since 1993 (yes, that's before a couple of my kids were born). To their astonishment, the hygenists were amazed that they had no work to do. HA! Poetic justice!

4. Since the pre-existence I believe, I ALWAYS put on my left sock, pant leg, shoe, or whatever first, then my right. NO exceptions. If for some reason the right goes on first, I take it off and start over. This is scarry for some of you who thought you knew me. Oh well, breathe deeply.

5. I can't stand for the 3-way light switches (you know, the ones that have 2 or more places you can turn a light off or on) to be in the "on" position if the light is off, or in the "off" position if the light is on. I will go all the way across the house/office/yard to fix this anomaly. So, for exampnle, our front exterior porch lights can be controlled by a switch in the kitchen by the sliding door, by a switch at the front door, or by a switch next to the exterior door going into Nick's room. I will navigate the entire house to fix an irregularity with the switch position. Actually, this annoys even me, but I have to live with myself so I just do it as fast as I can.

6. I am glad that we are only responsible to post 6 items or I would possibly be reclassified by my peers out of the sane component of the human race. However, I may find some sympathy among other men with this last one. I only use two squares of TP at a time, neatly folded over, when doing my business. If by some unfortunate chance the quality of the TP is sub-par, it may have to be three squares to avoid a puncture. I use the full size, then fold in half and use again, then in half again, thus getting three swipes out of two squares. That maximizes the use out of that piece of flush-it-away expense. Until I started living with females, I assumed this was pretty much the norm world-wide. One roll of TP can last me up to 12 years. Since I have been living with women now for the past 29 years, I realize that one roll is only supposed to last one day--you know, one roll=one day. When we are on TP rationing in the last days, I hope to make some converts. It drives me insane(r).

So there you have it. I'm as weird a duck as ever quacked. I'll get back to pictures for the next post--much safer.

OK, i haven't died. I'll get a real post up this weekend. With Laurie gone there is just too much to do! Look at that time--past midnight, so ridiculous. We have to tell you all about the wonderful trip to Mexico with the Cardon family. It was a truly unique and wonderful experience. More this weekend (I hope...)

There's a Man in the House

Happy Birthday to Nick! Here is the man on September 22

I came home Friday night from a 2-day board meeting for TSSA and here is what Dustin had to show me:

It turns out that he was running down the driveway as Nick was driving away, Dakota was chasing Nick, and Dustin quit watching his feet! Dakota does not realize that humans can't leap over obstacles (particularly when they are not looking) like dogs. Dakota tripped him while they were both running full speed. Poor guy, he was swollen about an inch out. Yes, it hurt about like it looks. We thought he broke his hip!

BJ and I are headed to Phoenix early in the morning. The fact is, we were headed out today until this odd object impaled itself on his tire. It turns out that the apartment maintenance guy who moved out their refrigerator today managed to handle the appliance in such a way as to pop off one of the feet! The assembly landed directly under BJ's tire such that as soon as he drove off, he ran over it. Naturally, there was a bolt pointing directly up at his tire. By the time we were able to deal with that, it was time to go see a movie!

Last item, another wild creature. Nick saw him and Zac caught him in the theater room. I have no idea how he got in there!

Nick rocks!

Saturday morning, with a day planned full of activities, Nick came in nearly doubled over in pain. He had been fighting whatever this is for a few days, but finally said he needed to go to the doctor. Laurie takes him to Baylor and the rest of us nervously await some news. We thought it might be some kind of kidney infection. Melanie said it sounded like appendicitis to her. Whatever it is, we all got a little nervous. After some blood work and whatever they do there for all that $$$, they concluded that he did not have appendicitis, but most likely kidney stones. For any of you whose lives have not included a run in either first hand or vicariously with kidney stones, those who have will tell you they are not your friends. If they are, they are very bad ones, ones that will cause you much pain and suffering! For now, we assume he has kidney stones that he will have to pass in the next week or so. If that does not happen, they want to do some kind of cat scan to narrow down further the possibilities. Bishop Ayres and I gave him a blessing. He can't be too bad off--he decided not to cancel his 18th birthday party we had scheduled for that night! So with his mind swimming in the morphine from the hospital and the codeine from the drugstore, we went ahead with the bash! Good thing--we counted over 50 people from school that came. No way we could have canceled that. It was wild but fun. I designated Dustin to be the official photographer. If any of you need a wedding photographer, (can you say BJ?!) Dustin might be the one. I have included some of his photos below. BJ & Katherine were there too, since, after all, it was actually BJ's 23rd! Nick's is not really til Monday. We had a bonfire in the back, heated the spa, put out the 100' slip n slide in the south pasture, played basketball and volleyball, had the ping pong table going as well as air hockey, ripstiks, green machine, and just about every contrivance we could come up with (except the motorized ones). It was great fun. Laurie cooked the weiners, I made rootbeer. All in all, quite a good night. 7--midnight or so. Thank goodness for church at 1 PM!

Earlier we went to the MacDonnell's fundraiser for cancer at Applebee's. Then we went to the gun show and wathched every kind of person buy, sell, and carry around weapons of all kinds. It gave us pause and cause for thought for sure.

Get ready for some football posts! Zac is No. 40. Tuesday night was his first game. He is on the 'A' team. He got one near sack and caused the QB to miss his toss. Way to go, Zac!

Well, I decided I needed a new car. The old one had 175,000. What a deal! Here it is:

Had ya going, didn't I ! Didn't really know what else to post, but it was time for a new one:)

Bailing Out-Carrie & Kai Left Today

Carrie and Kai have been at the casa for the past few days. They left today. Thanks for the visit! Like the sign Susan has in her kitchen, "I have learned that being with the ones I love is enough." For sure! What a pleasure to have them around. Kai is like a machine when he starts the leg squats--he just keeps going and going! Next visit, we expect he'll be running all over. Right now he can crawl about as fast as we walk. Thanks again for the visit, Carrie.